(This is a long one ENJOY)
I know all of you have been where I have been lately and that is a place of trying to control the world around you, by chasing it, chasing everything little thing you are trying to control or get control of… just to survive…. to survive just for yourself in a way that is “acceptable” and well maybe taught to us from day one of how to do things… But here is the kicker… the chase for control is daunting and frustrating. To make matters worse in my world anyway, it seems the more I do this, the more I feel others ARE organized and set and I am not…..
Let’s face it people… we all have those friends or acquaintances that “everything” seems to fall in place for, their worlds seem happening in the right way etc etc. Well I want to share that I am learning, that that – my friends – does not mean they have control either.
Seems we all have a strong desire to feel in control of our lives. Come on you know it is true. We have all been taught from an early age, get good grades…. pay our bills…. make sure we have a steady job…. Don’t go for the dream it’s too unpredictable…. Never feel sad, be happy 100% of the time… another wards control your actions, control your world.
Ok here is the funny thing and here is why I want to share this subject today… I have come to learn maybe more so recently… that even if you meet every single item on your list, which is a means to a perfect life… you can still feel overwhelmed, stressed out beyond belief and yes depressed and that my friends could really “royally suck”. Why? Because this feeling of out of control and the “non-perfect” life can then bring about physical and mental issues that could possibly be detrimental!
I know this all seems a bit down when you think about it. But I have spent a lot of time thinking about all of this. I have realized that you are never “really” in control, not from a personal soul level, and frankly I have come to see, it is ok, for many reasons to be out of control, which is cool. But, I know for a fact at least one of you reading this has already said… this blog topic is ridiculous, and Wendy has lost it… So, if that is you, can you just read on please. Just for a minute if you are reading this, try to let go of preconceived ideas and allow the universe to speak (yup I’m going there). There are many ways to do this thing “allowing the universe to speak” I promise. Observing nature, expressing your thankfulness allowing yourself to be and trust… these are just a few ways to let go and listen! Here are a few more, I have come to read a lot about lately and well…. There might be something to it… perhaps.
LET GO – Try letting go of the thoughts or dreams (of what is supposed to happen because our teachers or parents told us so) let go of those things you for whatever reason cannot grasp fully.
Listen this is the first lesson I learned as a spiritual soul many years ago… If you can release an idea or preconceived idea that is “supposed to be the right thing to happen” and I mean really let it go, then some say it will come back to you, 10-fold in a good way because you are not controlling the idea or thought is just “is”. Listen here is the bottom line… Life is not meant to be managed on every single level (some YES just not everything). Think about it. If you managed and controlled every single part of your life you would not have the power, time or effort or frankly you would not be lucky enough to experience new things, you would not have the time to learn about the unknown, you would not be able to take the time to try something new… and frankly you would not have any way of finding out what it is you like… because you are to busy “liking” the things that others have taught you to like because that is how you can control your life and that is how you are supposed to live your life…
For gd sakes we don’t really know what is going to happen in the next hour (come on things change, things happen out of our control all the time), but perhaps if we learn to relax and just go with the flow sometimes, we might see that something new and beneficial is actually a good thing to happen. Maybe my point here is that we need to let go of the thought or idea or dream that we can be in control of everything and just allow somethings to just come to us and teach us new tricks. Things do happen for a reason you know… You/We might just find out that the unknow is a good thing sometimes and new things are good. We all know what we know already, we have been shown how things are supposed to be for years…. Why not take a chance and experience something out of the norm…. might be enlightening. GOOD things come to us when we are not looking or ready but if we push them away because it is not how it is supposed to be, well we miss out on GREAT opportunities.
Allow yourself to feel out of control – Listen and think about that. We all are, well most people anyway, trying to create for ourselves empowerment (hell I talk about this with my clients all the time… “empower yourself “ blah blah blah) but here is the funny thing I’ve learned…. if you stop reaching for the control at all times and actually allow the opposite, the feeling of being helpless or allowing the unknown in a little then… maybe, just maybe, your best ideas, thoughts and solutions will come about because you surrendered to a preconceived idea of how something should be. Here is the funny thing… Yup hysterical actually… once you allow yourself to surrender there is a plethora of “potentials” and you might just find the universe allows you to shine in new ways, because you are now embracing the truth from the power viewpoint (the truth of what actually is happening without controlling something 100%) and here is the reward folks…. now you are no longer a victim. All because you simply let go of the struggle to control, by asking for guidance and by listening or just allowing yourself to “be”. It is at this point you can truly start empowering yourself and start to be in control of the real shit that happens in life, not the preconceived ideas of what is supposed to happen. Do you understand? Though the unknow is scary and hard work…. Nothing bad has ever come from hard work and allowing that lesson to happen is just thought provoking.
Listen to the Universe learn through Nature – Mother Earth is funny… She is full of beauty and gives all the time. Take the time to observe her, listen to her, allow yourself to receive her gifts…. Here’s the deal folks… we are not here on this planet by mistake. Each and everyone of us has a lesson to learn and we all have a lesson to teach too. Powerful thought right…. But this cannot be done if we are too busy controlling how things are supposed to be….. We are all part of Mother Earth and therefore part of the universe. Maybe once we can see that and really grasp that, and maybe, just maybe, we can then move out of preconceive ideas of how things should be and into the love of experiencing and that of helping makes things rise up to new levels by sharing our strengths, ideas and concepts even though they may be different – because change might be good! Phew powerful…
Nature is beauty and might just be the glue that holds everything together…
Show Appreciation – When you show your appreciation of the things happening around you good or crazy…. You will feel lighter and happier because you will start to see the good things happening in life whether you are in control or not – great things are always happening! There is something very powerful about truly being authentic and thankful and showing it by doing the little things in life… like thanking someone with a card (or verbally), taking the time to just make someone else smile, or maybe even helping someone with a task they have been thinking about doing for a while (hell it might take you just 5 minutes to complete and it brings the other person a lifetime of smiles)… When you take the time to show your appreciation, by doing, things will look brighter. It may take a while, it may even be hard, but eventually things start to look better and you become happier… it’s the little things you do in appreciation that will open up your heart with the universe on a spirit level, which WILL bring about trust and happiness… Promise!
Think about it… your thoughts and actions are important to self-growth even if they are done for someone else at first. The more you learn that this life is not all about you, but about you and your interactions and practices with others and the universe the more you will start to see your potential and your self-worth. By allowing yourself to just be (try meditation or yoga or long walks or…..) negative thoughts begin to vanish and you begin to rust more. Yup true story… It comes from the realizations that your organization skills, your happiness, your smiles and your love all come from within you but are influenced by a force bigger than you…. The universe, it is here to help you learn to see to move forward if you listen that is…. Allow confusion and be thankful for the lessons you are shown and taught and allow them to influence you to focus on self-healing because the universe will help you and who knows… without following the preconceived ideas and taking on the unknown you might just find yourself more, Hell you might even like yourself more if you live your truth!
Ok here are a few ways to find control and growth I have found helpful
Allow yourself to feel true love even if it is to good to be true or not coming to you when you think it should… Love is a very underestimated emotion known to mankind… BUT Love is a force that moves the universe, supports happiness and, well, frankly, it is the ultimate goal… love of existence and self! Love not only moves us individually it moves the universe. Love is caring, Love is helping, Love is learning, and Love is tolerance, Love is understanding, Love is unconditional, Love is discipline and frankly, because LOVE is ALWAYs there! It is the one thing that should be in everything, if you can just allow it in and allow it to show you, that you are awesome.
By influencing others through Love by prioritizing Love in your life, the universe will give it to you stronger and more powerfully than you have even felt it before… don’t push it away or run away… instead learn from it, use it and run with it to the next adventure of your life for LOVE conquers all and makes things better. Practice this without preconceive ideas or control, and shit there is not stopping you!
Intuition is powerful beyond belief – Intuition comes from your soul but for some reason we tend to ignore it… maybe because it is part of the unknown? But reality is your intuition is your true guide once you find it and trust it (which takes baby steps btw). Intuition is so important its mind blowing… but you can not allow it to come from fear of the unknown instead have it come from a place of allowing the truth to be known despite what others have taught you… Intuition comes from within and I believe might be a way of the universe showing you the way to your next step next happy moment next smiles next next next. Intuition is found through brief moments of awareness and that is cool!! Don’t ignore it instead embrace it. Allow it to just “be” the importance of intuition is just incredible and it may one road to Trust and Love with yourself.
[Ok if your one of those people that look at the negative don’t go there or skip over this because there is ALWAYS something good to learn from every situation. But we can agree to disagree on this… LOL]
Listen to the good stuff – Listen everyone has known suffering of some kind. People tend to focus on the negative instead of the good things as little as they may be but understand that is just detrimental and that attention can control you to craziness. Really it can, if you want to build love then you must focus on the good…. Confront the negative yes but don’t let it take over…. It is just life’s way of throwing you a curve ball, but you really don’t have to give into it. Redirect it there is always positiveness in every situation ALWAYS… the universe always will provide this… think about it – do you think it is by accident that you have great things in your life (if you choose to see them) like family, friends, lovers, blood flowing or your heart beating… take the time to notice these things, acknowledge them because they are coming into your life… Appreciate the smiles from a random person, enjoy the meal that was just cooked for you even if different than what your used to, enjoy the giggles you experience because they are just that happy moments, enjoy the time you spend with you feet in the sand or on top of the grass because it feels good, enjoy the time you spend with another just being because it is a true connect and even if it happens out of the blue or in thin air it is real, enjoy see another’s soul even if just for a second in time because it is a blessing that they let you in, Enjoy Enjoy Enjoy. There can always be some negative shit sent your way but they are distractions … It is the small and often unnoticed actions are truly the universe showing you kindness, showing you love and frankly sending you the LOVE you deserve on the level that you can handle and that is COOL!!!! But it is only cool if you pay attention and allow the universes intentions of safety and LOVE and TRUST to just “be”!
OK guys I could go on and on obviously…. But I think it is time for me to make a statement here…. Do not try to control everything it is not good or productive for your happiness.
Take interest in who you are, how you live your life and how you do that. Take interest in the universe and allow it to inspire you, to move you and to well just “be” one with you. Try looking at your life from the view of allowing and engaging and learning and enjoying not that of what we have been taught – control. Listen to the signs act upon them, make changes and use communication with yourself and others as it is universal solvent to solutions. This is a powerful way to bring harmony and LOVE into your life. Don’t allow your fear and controlling ways rule you or consume you… instead engage so that you are more comfortable and find your “box”, find your truths and find your happiness because the universe will accept it can you?
Peace Out
Mother Earths Lesson
I watch her roll
I watch her break
I admire her color
I admire her calm
I listen to her sounds
Something is different at this moment
Than from days gone past
Today I hear her talking to me directly,
loud and full of passion
Allow growth and learning she says
Allow yourself to rise above it all
Force a laugh and force a loud giggle
Allow those happy thoughts
So no matter how hard it seems
I listen with an open HEART
I do as I’m told…
I force that smile upon my face
I find something to laugh about
I mimic the giggles I hear
I find myself contemplating,
to find what she is teaching me
It is hard, but I continue
for what seems like an eternity
Forcing myself to listen
Forcing myself to smile
Forcing the giggles and the laughs
And then I hear it
I feel it
I experience it
like a falling tree In the forest
It hits me….
My smile, after seeing a rainbow for the first time
My joy, after hearing an awesome song, you know the kind… you get up and start dancing to, even when nobody’s there
I giggle so hard, I need to pee, all because I heard a silly joke
So, what is IT she wanted me to hear?
I am awesome
I am loving
I am silly and fun and chill
I am a good friend
Best of all….
I am worth it
I am worth receiving it
I am worth living
I am worth Love
I am Love
